Jet-Puffed Strawberry Mallows

When I saw these on the grocery store shelf, I had to have them. And bonus, they were a hit at the checkout counter.
You know what a marshmallow tastes like. They taste like that. Except when you put them in hot chocolate, and the strawberry melts off the puff in sweet, creamy slicks. I recommend at least two per cup.
Bonus bonus, they have a squishy sound when eaten with your mouth open—we don't need no stinkin' manners.
Marshmallows are a weird food suitable for many things: Camping, dieting, baking, pelting your friends while pretending to aim for their mouths.
Bonus bonus bonus, there's a Choking Warning on the back telling people to, "Eat one at a time." Has someone at Kraft seen where boredom and stupidity can lead? Did Eddy have a point about taxing just "the stupid people?"
I beg you, no matter how tedious things get, drive me to rehab if I ever cut a marshmallow into five pieces with a scissors then arrange it in flower shapes.
There are more "Berry Fun Ideas" on the back.
The Strawberry Mallow Cheesecake Squares look hideous, and I'm way ahead of them on smashing marshmallows in between cookies and shoving the mess into a microwave.
Of course the corner stone of marshmallow cuisine is the Rice Krispie square, and the pink tones are perfect for the holiday.
Mmmm, red dye #40. Happy Valentine's Day, Allied Chemical!