ChocolateFest

he first time I drove through Burlington, Wisc. I wanted to see the town that hosted ChocolateFest. I thought I'd pocket some brochures, look around, get a cup of tea.

I'd meant to go to the fitness center that morning, but got distracted. Then I got lost looking for a piny hiking trail with eagles flying o'er head while specifics such as name, location, and distance escaped me.

I ended up on the very top of an oberservation tower, not a good place for an acrophobe, but a great place to look inward rather than downward, although looking outward might have helped me find out where I was.
After several more wrong turns (which by now should be assumed), I managed to drive through Burlington before ending up seated next to a glowering old Asian man on the bow of The Lady of the Lake.

I was still in Wisconsin, so hoorah. But it struck me that I'd rather do this, roll with getting lost inside the Cheddar Curtain while munching travel candy, than find new adjectives for the words "sweet," "creamy," and "nougat."
Note: I'd like to thank Jim of Jim's Chocolate Mission for introducing me to the word "splodge" in his review of Reber Mozartkugeln truffles.
It might be worth mentioning (I'm going to at any rate) that I got turned around on the well groomed trails of Lapham Peak until I found a path of teaching tools left by a group of elementary school teachers preparing for a field trip.

I later got caught peeing behind foliage—GCPBF—by some guy who may or may have not been a teacher. I didn't ask to see his teaching tools.

he second time I drove to Burlington was for ChocolateFest, Friday, May 22 - Monday, May 25, with carnival hours starting May 20.

There were a preponderance of bare feet on the midway and rides

According to official brochure copywriter Dana Roberts, the festival started with help from the local Nestle USA in 1987.
Another chocolate company took the low road on the Hershey highway a year later, suing the city of Burlington over their new nickname, "Chocolate City." It took years for Hershey's to settle, according to Roberts.

If this post had actually been written (rather than gathered) in May, I couldn't mention the E. Coli Warning by the FDA About Nestle Tollhouse Cookies. Take them out of the fridge and throw them away unopened. Don't risk contaminating surfaces, don't bake them, throw them away now.

They began to call the celebration by its current name, ChocolateFest, in 1998, and started to have it at the end of the month in 2004, taking advantage of Memorial Day weekend.

There's been some interesting chocolate art over the years, including a Harley, and a bed—there's something kinky, erotic, and deliciously messy about a bed of chocolate. I don't have those photos so please enjoy this sweet hat instead.

Notice the Bubbagum tattoo

I went to ChocolateFest on Memorial Day, while Nanci ate brats and teenagers skulked on park benches. I guess that would make it (counting on fingers) six days ago. Play along with me here.

This year's theme was Alice In Chocolateland, which I would have realized right off had my head not been in a rabbit hole of its own.

It took a few more rabbit ears,

a candy bar named after one of the most brutal drug lords of the last century,

evidence of psychotropic drug withdrawal,
and a Deadhead hippie kid shining, gleaming, streamingflaxenwaxen—I didn't know if he was going to pull out a pack of Naked Papers or call me mommy—to catch a theme; and I think I caught the wrong one.

But the youth of south eastern Wisconsin were clothed in candy wrappers in a pageant called Project Yum-Way,

Monster Energy drinkers were grinding out sweet dreams on miniramps,

there was a creepy horse's head named Henry,

and Cocoa beans and Escobars.

But these, two luscious pieces of bacon splodged with chocolate, were the Holy Grail of ChocolateFest. I'm thinking the many candy vendors would dispute this. Do you understand why having a candy blog may not be the thing for me?

More from sulky teenagers forced to eat chocolate covered bacon—what, you thought I was going to eat it—and other disgusting treats from the bottomless bag of Expo candy after a lovely post from my favorite Kanook, Chrissy.