Hot Tamales Cotton Candy

Hot Tamales Cinnamon Flavored Cotton Candy is a great idea that twirls one of my favorite childhood candies into spicy spun sugar. Despite an initial burst of something too strong, it's perfectly sweet and peppery.

The flavors perk up when the tufts melt in your mouth and turn into a melty crunch. I love how the familiar cinnamon sting follows the sugar residue.

The pink clouds of  spiced cinnamon are addictive with 37 sugars in half a bag if you're counting.  It's a pretty close Hot Tamales approximation and should please the red hot, red dollar, and atomic fire ball crowd.

Bonus: My almost twenty something cousin and Dish taste tester said "i wish I could like this multiple times" when I posted the photo on Facebook.

Chewable Liquid Taffy

If you like eating toothpaste or snuck baby aspirin as a kid, you probably still  won't like liquid Chewbies. The tube of orange glop may be a fun looking liquid sugar delivery system, but it puts the "desp" in desperate, the" err" in emerrgency candy.

Maybe it's a popular playground food, if you're pivy to this information please let me know. And speaking of privy...never mind. The only thing extreme about this Extreme Creations taffy  is that it would make an extremely sticky super adhesive.

It's more tacky than taffy, and hard to dispense without creating an insect frenzied mess. You wouldn't believe the state of the photo site, especially after I tried cleaning up with paper towels.

Milk Chocolate Coated Licorice Bites

That's right, chocolate coated black licorice. Before you say "blech" and switch channels, it's not what I expected and might not be what you think. Or maybe it is.

I grabbed these Walgreens Candy Classics in an adventurously munched out moment without knowing the esteemed Kookaburra makes a similar product.

One cautious bite into a juicy piece of chocolate revealed soft Aussie black licorice smothered in thick milk chocolate. The smell of the bag was deceiving, wafting solely of cocoa, and the smooth  chocolate made a happy match for the bite of black licorice. The two distinct tastes complimented each other in texture and flavor. There's a soft crunch to the milk chocolate and the anise flavor lingers on your tongue.

 Walgreen's Candy Classic Milk Choc Coated Licorice Bites, are more than bite-sized and more than the concoction of a munchies craving gone wrong. Intense and mild, sharp and smooth, soft black licorice and milk chocolate coating were an unexpected nosh.

Mike and Ike Fruit Twists

Mike and Ikes are one of those brands that scream "don't mess with a good thing" yet last I checked there were nine flavors. The really good thing in my sugar coated book is the imitable grape Jolly Joes so I don't really care what they do with strawberry or green apple.

Neither filled twists are in the same league as the Original Fruits or the mouth watering grape Joes, but they do what we've all been thinking or trying to do on our own, combine sour powder and sweet licorice. I enjoyed the crunch of the sugar filling. Although these try to mimic the classic Mike and Ike taste, the twists are more tart while maintaining the sweetness of the crunchy jelly capsule.

The Strawberry Filled Twists have an almost overwhelming smell and are so slick and slippery I couldn't clamp down when I tried to nosh and type. This could be an any berry flavor although they seemed oddly thicker and more rectangular than the other two. Is it just me? Probably.

Green Apple and Watermelon are paired together in a King Size 3.3 oz bag with the Green Apple having a weird, oily after taste and the Watermelon twist having the same with the most artificial taste of the three. Because green apple Jolly Ranchers set the standard for this flavor, the green apple Twists were comparatively sub par.

You can't suck the filling out or hold on to it too well, so munch down on a solid idea with a shaky aftertaste.

Dots Peach Sour Slices

At some point I started putting Dots in my movie popcorn instead of Jujyfruits. I was no longer a child but had no intention of putting away childish things. Along with my cousin, I'd chuck green Jujyfruits at the screen when the movie got as bad as the gag inducing mint flavor. Yes, back then they were mint. Horrid little things. I mean the green Jujyfruits, not us, but either way.
The rest of the box was great, one of my favorite candies to this day, but at some point during the movie frenzied 70s and 80s we decided to broaden our movie candy horizons and try Dots. Not an ugly mint drop in the box.
According to the Tootsie website, Dots flavors hadn't changed from 1945 to 2003 when Tropical Dots were introduced. I remember having fun with Dots Elements in 2008, although I only found three of the flavors and have yet to taste Earth. Tasting Earth, that would make a great name for a band. I'm pretty sure I saw them at Shopko recently, will take a look.
Everyone loved the Yogurt Dots we tried at a La Crosse game that same year and both brands took a lovely photo.
This will be my first taste of actual candy in almost three weeks, so be gentle.
The first bite of Dots Sour Peach Slices was sour indeed, and immediately followed by an infusion of peach that reminded me of fruit pie. The sour sugar coating stayed on my lips and made me want more.
The second bite wasn't as good as the first, with a little artificial flavor coming through and the last taste on your tongue and lips a bit too sour. Since I'm only allowing myself the one Dot, my impression might be different if I ate more, but I suspect the Sour Slices are too sour and only become more so the deeper you dig.
 Nice try, good fruit flavor choice, but I'd like to see a nice juicy peach Dot without the sour coating. They also come in Watermelon and Grapefruit, but I don't know why either would taste better.

At The Lake Mills Farmers Market

There's nothing quite like a Farmers' Market to make you want to fill your plate with fresh vegetables.

Kettle corn is a vegetable, right?
I wanted to go for a bike ride and was feeling feisty enough to deal with the miserable geese who chase and snap at bikers on the Glacial Drumlin Trail (though not up for the rash of bike muggings around town).
After navigating around trucks and pipe—both the bike trail in Lake Mills and the South Stacks at Memorial Library are under construction along with pretty much the entire city of Madison—I happened upon the Lake Mills Farmer's Market in one of the most charming parks in the state.

This place is gorgeous and small town without that creepy Stephen King overtone. Although I'm not so sure about the guy on the bike (follow the white hand and finger). He inspired me to start a folder of background dirty looks.
And as much as these homemade cookies and God help me free samples tempted, I did not cave. Maybe it was the guy on the bike judging me. I do know the little girl's mom was making mmm yummy sounds.

I love this kid's expression though. I'll have to ask about the egg crate of what looks like farm fresh eggs. You know, it's really hard to take photos in the kind of sunlight we had yesterday, but no complaints, a frabjous day!
Right, Tara? Tara the Wheaten Terrier sparked a little bit of debate on the Dish Curtain Facebook page.
Number of Eyes: More than one, less than three.

The Lake Mills Farmers' Market goes from May through October every Wednesday from 2 pm to Dusk, although I know Dorothy (left) has been there first thing furnishing pastry to those with an early morning sweet tooth.

Commons Park
200 Water Street
Lake Mills, WI

From their Facebook Page:

To become a vendor stop by on market day and visit the Main Street Tent next to the picnic shelter. Here you can meet the manager and pick up an application. Same day set up is allowed if there is space! Only $5 per day or $75 for the season. You can also see the rules and application online at www.lakemillsfarmersmarket.com.

Going 'round In Circles All The Time or No Sugar For You!

The last candy I ate before I started overreading was a Grape Juicy Twist. Overreading is like overeating, but done online and potentially more dangerous.
I've been reading about Vertigo because "I'm so dizzy, my head is spinning" and there may be connections to almost everything good to eat or drink and the intrusive condition.
Until I get that coveted ENT appointment (guess I'll have to sit and spin until August), the Dish will be reducing it's sugar intake. Ironic, ain't it.

Meanwhile, I've turned to fruit. It's a healthier source of sugar in which I immediately overindulged.
When I looked at the nutritionist with sad velvet painting puppy dog eyes I talked about a candy blog I can't seem to quit, and she said, "Okay, don't worry about fruit for now."
No one has ever said that to me before.
I'm not quite ready to revise the name of the blog, but here are some possibilities:

* The Wisconsin Fruit Dish
* The Wisconsin Randy Dish—Feeling Amorous In The Dairy State From Eating All That Fruit
* The Wisconsin Sandy Fish (I have photos for that)
* The Wisconsin Candy Wish
* The Madison Blues (already taken, but that doesn't seem to stop people)
* No More Sugar Makes Jeanna Something Something

I'll work on it.
Expect more novelty candy, random fruit smoothies, lower sugar snacks, and photos using all but the one bit of candy I'll eat with a hearty let's see what happens attitude.
Let's see what happens.

Grape Juicy Twists

I had a green licorice Jones as a kid and was thrilled to see flavored licorices popping up years ago. But back when All Day Suckers dared you to finish them in less than 24 hours, green licorice was mint. Today they're Green Apple with flavors like Rootbeer and Cinnamon spicing up a zany selection.

But where's the mint? Not at Shopko.

Shopko, which is slowly making a run for post worthy candy, had a few Juicy Twists flavors— if you want to see them all look on the Kenny's Candy website.

I've had the Green Apple and that kind of fruity tartness along with the softer chew wasn't for me. Green Apple is one of those flavors that can easily go awry, but even the most artificial grape something can be passable.

I found the Grape Twists passable, but dull. They smell more tempting than they taste, and a bite or two of the Twists not sacrificed for a photo shoot didn't make me long for more.

Nutty Package Disappoints

It was nice to hear from the makers of the Twin Bing, one of the first nostalgic candies I talked to Deb of Debbie's Sweets 'n Treats about while she still had the store in Oak Creek. (You can order from their booming online business.)
A candy enthusiast can get excited when talking about a nostalgic favorite like the Twin Bing, so it was disappointing to sample the Palmer's Candies sent via what looked like an organ donor box. The photos were more fun to take than the candy to eat.
I'll start with the good news: The large Styrofoam box was stuffed with air pillows and did well through all the early spring hots and colds, chills and spills.
The Kiddie Chow was okay, pretty much the Puppy Chow I make each Christmas, so much easier than the elaborate cut outs the boys used to want—truly a Christmas miracle when they started asking for Puppy Chow instead of Christmas cookies.

Palmer's chow tasted like a Kit Kat and could pass for a crowd pleasing snack, nice and crunchy with the right amount of peanut butter in the center. Keep in mind I'm not one for peanut butter candy except for peanut brittle and the ridges and very top of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, and this was a peanut butter themed sampler.

The Peanut Butter Crispy Yums weren't. Maybe it's because I've been dealing with a stubborn bout of veritgo (sugar makes things worse), that I'm comparing the value of Sugars to taste—there is not 19g worth of yum to every 40g of Crispy Yum.
I can't recommend the chocolate and would be surprised if anyone else could. The peanut butter was extra sweet in the Crispy Yum which was too rich and sweet all around.

The Chocolate Peanuts had the same unpleasant taste. They didn't hold up well when placed in a plastic sandwich bag and exposed to who knows what in the back of my car for who knows how long, and maybe that's a good thing. This is a generic tasting chocolate lacking any kind of complexity.
My taste testers didn't have much to say except "To be honest, it wasn't the best. The chocolate tasted more like wax than chocolate." Jackie added, "The puppy chow was ok."
The peanuts were crunchy and I didn't get a bad nut, so there you go, ending on a positive note.

Flipflops & Ice Cream Cones: Galerie Lollipops

Succumbing to a novelty lollipop makes you wonder about their history and who really invented them. A Brit may have coined the name, but we'll look to 1908 Racine for the invention of a lollipop machine. Score another one for Wisconsin.
It's hard not to think of what should have been the Seinfeld series finale—called The Betrayal, it took you backward through the story as you watched Kramer's lollipop get bigger—when thinking giant sucker. Every kid's dream, one of the easiest candies to draw, and the coolest Oz accessory besides the witch's broom.
These two Galerie lollipops screamed "summer" and although made in China and all that may infer, were fruity, tasty, fun, and more than I could handle. Watch out for sharp edges.
The orange sherbet flip flop was fun to slurp, but the hard sugar flower was initially rough on the tongue and sharper than it looks. But that didn't last too long and eventually the sucker cracked nicely, making it easy to consume despite final sharp corners. About one third flip flop was enough for me in one sitting.



I was impressed by how distinctive the cone and ice cream flavors were in the pink cone pop. The ice cream tasted and even smelled like bubble gum. The cone seemed like an artificial though not unpleasant butterscotch with a hint of peppermint. The two flavors went together nicely and the more you worked the lollipop, the more peppermint flavor came from behind the bubble gum. This sucker also cracked nicely and more quickly at the top of the cone. I thought the bubble gum after taste was a final smile.
They're a good size, just thick enough, and conducive to waving about by the sturdy plastic stick.

Summer Lovin': The Marshmallow Cone

With Babcock only a few traffic snarls away, it's always time for ice cream. And when the weather goes from snowing to 84 in a week, a marshmallow cone is a nice compromise.
I understand the nostalgic appeal of the mallow cone. If you were a frugal penny candy buyer as a child, mini cones were a colorful high ticket item that only made their way into your paper bag if you were splurging.
This is a much larger and ponderous version of the retro mini marshmallow cone that I found at Shopko.
There were a few other tempting summer themed treats along side the striped patio glasses and orange beach towels at Shopko, but the marshmallow ice cream cone is only 170 calories and contains no fat. So why not.
But then again would you care about nutrition facts if you're willing to chow down on an ounce plus of garnished marshmallow.
The marshmallow ice cream is thick and rubbery and not as much fun as the classic mini marshmallow cone. It does come with a real wafer cone which has its own wrapper, and there's a cool sugar swirl and fake jimmies on the fake ice cream.
The Galerie Marshmallow Cone is neither Peep nor classic mini, but I suspect many will be given to kids who are going to toss them after a few bites anyway.
Not quite emergency candy, better to look at than to eat, this marshmallow cone is still amusing and a sure sign that summer will jump over spring like it usually does and bring all sorts of weird and wonderful sugar along with it.

Easter Bunny Leftover

A chocolate bunny is often the center piece of an Easter table or basket. But despite being center stage it can keep watch over aging Peeps if it's the kind with nasty, dyed, hard frosting and insanely sweet waxy chocolate product.
Not the case with the Madeline milk chocolate bunny I found at Shopko, which has been giving Tarjet a run for it's money in the candy aisles.

The 4 oz. chocolate wrapped in "Italian Foil" (I don't know what that is, I only found sites about fencing) smells milder than the too sweet commercial chocolate and from the first bite you can tell it's different. Smooth with a bite, pleasant aftertaste.

This bunny wafted a promising blend of chocolate my way even as I untangled it from its gold foil. There was a well balanced sweetness which offered good texture in a solid bite. It was easy to break apart, pleasant to chomp into, and had the slightly sharp overtone I crave in milk chocolate.

Wrap It Up

I love these Russell Stover 2 oz. assorted chocolate four packs. You can throw the festively wrapped  boxes in any give Easter basket with no fuss and very little muss.
Calling these "Fine Assorted Chocolates" is the perfect description. The Kansas City, Mo chocolates are exactly that, fine.

These aren't Candina's chocolates, nor should they be unless you're making a very expensive gourmet basket, but the assorted chocolates are a step up from much of the more fun than refined mainstream mold chocolates.

There's a toasty coconut milk chocolate, a rich chocolate cream dark chocolate, the mandatory milk chocolate caramel, and what tastes like maple cream in dark chocolate. All are a welcome break from some of the more pedestrian Easter fare.

Junior Mints Pastels Pale

 

Taking a break from jelly beans, I tried several Limited Edition Junior Mints Pastels. Limited Edition, like it's a box of Star Wars collectibles.

They don't live up to their Christmas cousin, Junior Mints Peppermint Crunch, but are saved by the traditional gooey mint filling. There is plenty of that, being a Junior Mint, but the thick mint ooze stuffed inside each bite isn't enough to recommend this version.
These were another out of a bag of beaten up and forgotten Easter candy in better shape than they should be. Sure, a few of the round bites stuck to the inside of the box and some smacked of cardboard, but they were surprisingly edible.
Like Sweetarts Jelly Beans, they were quickly addictive without being a top shelf seasonal candy choice.
The downfall to the Pastels was the smooth shell. It had an artificial white chocolate taste which was like eating cake decorations or stale Smooth & Melty Mints. They did melt in your mouth, but I didn't want them to. In all fairness the stale taste was most likely due to my general mistreatment of Easter sugar.
The familiar chilly filling made them disappear from the aging box, but still no sticky thumbs up. The unappealing smooth shell had pretty robin's egg blue and chick yellow colors, perfect for the season, but ultimately tanked the candy.
I'd seek out their Peppermint Crunch or stick to the original.

Sweetarts Jelly Beans

Sweetarts Jelly Beans taste enough like Sweetarts to earn the name. The candy shell is easily separated from the spongy middle by a light crunch. The candy coating flakes off nicely on the tongue and this Easter jelly bean entry doesn't disappoint.

The cherry Sweetarts Jelly Bean is a tart pink spark, and the orange hints of citrus. There's as Easter purple which is a recognizable sour grape, green tastes like a green apple gum ball, and yellow is a bright lemon pinch. I found the Blue Punch (blue) an indistinguishable mishmash.
Let there be no mistake, this candy is addictive and seems to get better the more you eat it. They beg to be sampled one at a time, not because the flavors are strong or to be savored, but because the tart is just right and eating them that way tastes better.
I didn't find any of the happy spring colors on my hands or clothes, and Sweetarts Jelly Beans, like much of the Easter candy I had stashed in my car long before Easter, held up remarkably well in cold and warmish weather.
They'd be great in little baggies or see through eggs because the hues are attractive and seasonal.

Dip Me In Chocolate And Call It Easter

I started out my candy quest for this post fighting the tangle of roadwork on the way to a place in West Allis intriguingly called Half Nuts. Unfortunately I tossed out Google Maps for directions from the source which led me in the circle of closed ramps which is Milwaukee. Makes you wish Miller Park were even further west, say Lake Mills.
So I'm reviewing these, Jelly Belly's Jelly Bean Chocolate Dips, the bean you want waiting for you and they end of Lent if you've given up candy. Or, if you're going to break your promise to God, the jelly bean you want to do it with. Break your promise I mean. Never mind.
The bags are incredibly easy to open, the chocolate is better than mosts. The bean itself is powerful, and the candy shell is replaced by creamy, rich chocolate with a kick.
There's a big difference going from flavor to flavor that's almost jolting. I found the cherry the most delicious and hard to put down, thinking it might be better mixed in the bag with just the gel, no chocolate.

Coconut
Overall they scream Almond Joy or Mounds bars, both of which I love. This would be a nice summer party candy or snack. There's less of a difference going from coconut to orange, but from cherry to coconut, wow, it's as if you're eating on a
whole
other
level.
Very Cherry
They're flavored with black currant and does best what Jelly Belly does so well–it tastes the way you want a  cherry to taste.
This flavor was so inspiring I started to look for factory tours in Pleasant Prairie after eating a handful.
Very Cherry reminded me of Pate de Fruits and was the jelly bean with which I first found the chocolate coating to be overwhelming.
How do they get all that chocolate on one tiny bean?
Orange
Orange Dips tastes like smooth chocolate wrapped around a chewy orange rind—and maybe by next year Jelly Belly will have Christmas beans and this could be a flagship flavor.

In the case of Very Cherry, the Jelly Bean Chocolate Dips could do without the dip. However, if you're a slave to the bean, you might have found your next favorite Easter candy or at least your new favorite jelly bean.

Must There Be All These Colors Without Names: Hawaiian Punch Jelly Beans

Jelly beans are a year round thing now (thank you Jelly Belly). Bags of beans start to fill the shelves like candy canes at Christmas when Easter candy comes out on Valentine's Day.
And like candy canes, there are brand name hits and misses to tempt the overwhelmed basket stuffer.
Life Savers Jellybeans are a miss—made in Mexico, distributed by Wrigley, the Cubs still suck—but I've sampled more brand name hits. Sour Patch and Hawaiian Punch Jelly Beans are a hit.
I'm not surprised that Sour Patch Jelly Beans spin a charming blend of sugary coated tang. They're sparkly and hold up well if hidden away for later. The candy shell is a little thick, but I love the coating and overall look. They compliment their gummi namesake well.
As enamored as I am with the Sour Patch beans, Hawaiian Punch Jelly Beans are a sprightly rival.
The Fruit Juicy Reds tasted like both a tall cup of Hawaiian Punch then something less juicy, so I went through the bag to make sure I had the colors right. I'd confused Fruit Juicy Red with Lemon Berry Squeeze (see Color Key). These beans would benefit from a more distinctive color palette and a little more zip in a few of their flavors. Brach's needs a better color key than the blurry one on the back of the package.

A BETTER COLOR KEY

Red - Fruit Juicy Red
Lime Green with Dark Green & Yellow Speckles - Green Berry Rush
Blue with Darker Blue Speckles - Berry Blue Typhoon

Red with Yellow-Orange Speckles - Lemon Berry Squeeze 

Yellow-Orange with Red Speckles - Mango Passionfruit Squeeze

Orange with Lighter Orange Speckles - Orange Ocean

I found myself looking for the pleasant bite of the Green Berry Rush and the Lemon Berry Squeeze most often. The Lemon Berry especially gives you the classic Hawaiian Punch taste of childhood while suggesting flavored lemonade.The fresh citrus overtones of the Orange Ocean reminds me of a tangerine more than an orange—it has everything but seeds and pulp.
The Berry Blue Typhoon smacks of sweet sour bubble gum without being overwhelming, not my favorite, but the color stands out. The Mango Passionfruit Squeeze tastes a little odd. You can tell it's mango, but it stops short of the refreshing Orange Ocean, tipping over into the land of bland.
There's 100% vitamin C (36g carbs) per serving in Hawaiian Punch Jelly Beans. They're in a two way tie with Sour Patch Jelly Beans in the Dish Easter Bean ranking right now. However, the threat of Coconut, Orange, and Very Cherry Jelly Belly Chocolate Dips loom.

Just A Spoonful of Chocolate

The NCA's Chocolate Council sent photos and a link to The Story of Chocolate in honor of American Chocolate Week, March 20-March 26.
Shouldn't every week be chocolate week? How about every other week alternating with Gummi Week. There's a National Chocolate Council? Do they sip chocolate drinks out of edible tea cups?

The National Confectioner's Association offers information such as how many minutes of biking it takes to work off a 1.5 oz candy bar (30), and The Story of Chocolate tells you it takes two to four days to make a chocolate bar. After a few minutes on the Council's website you will no longer be interested in how long it takes to work off a 1.5 oz candy bar.

It will also tell you that the cacao tree is "delicate" and needs taller trees to shade it in order to survive. The cacao leaves themselves can move 90 degrees to protect more tender leaves from sunlight.



Cacao trees produce these pods which can be more than a foot long, growing directly from the trunk or branches sans stem. They take up to six months to ripen, The Story of Chocolate goes on to tell you. The outside of the pod varies in texture and the inside contains juice, pulp, and many seeds.
I could spoon feed you chocolate facts all day, but will leave you with the reason the pods, trees, and tree yield varieties are so Spocking fascinating.

Photos courtesy of the National Confectioners Association

Time Out With Magic Milk Straws

I love milk, I love the product, the promotional campaign, and that Annie Leibovitz photo of Whoopi Goldberg (who did a got milk? ad as well as the tub shot). I don't need a straw full of cocoa powder or vanilla flavor to enjoy my favorite drink, but it was time to stick a straw in a glass of milk and see what happened.
The got milk? product has toy overtones—watching the flavor beads zip up and down the clear straw giggles, "Happy Fun Snack Time." And you can see the flavor get stronger toward the end of the glass when the straw finally colors the milk and drips its last drop.
Not only are Magic Milk Straws a break from massive amounts of sugar in bright and pastel colors, they're suck-ready.
I had to cut the plastic open after a short battle with the five and six packs of straws, but once in, you just stick the straw in a frosty glass of the white stuff and decide if using the straw upside down works better than right side up (it does).

I found the mellow Vanilla a good opportunity to float in bananas to boost the mild flavor with a fresh fruit taste. The bananas were even better at the end of the drink and gave the already healthy snack an even healthier kick. I'm snacking on a frozen four straw Vanilla with banana slushy right now.
The Chocolate straw was oddly sweet in the way many products aimed at kids are, yet aromatic and enjoyable in a guilty pleasure kind of way. I went nuts and used two straws in a pint glass fresh from the freezer for the Chocolate Magic Straw and loved every playful sip.
Magic Milk Straws come in Vanilla, Chocolate, Strawberry, and Cookies & Cream. The nutritional value comes from the milk, though the Magic Milk Straw website lists the straws as all natural, gluten free, low in sugar with no fat or cholesterol.
It also says "Lactose Free." I guess it's not as funny if you drink Lactaid or soy milk.

Ice Cream Flavored Eggs

Knowing that PAAS Splashed Assorted Malted Milk Eggs are ice cream flavored makes them more palatable.They're attractive enough and look good nestled in Easter grass or a candy dish. But aside from sprinkling in a few of the less offensive flavors in an Easter basket, I'd avoid them completely.
Taste better Splashed Assorted Malted Milk Eggs.
 Although the lively eggs contain cocoa powder, only the white outer, chocolate inner, tastes of the bean. Their waxy outer shell dooms even the least offensive egg (white shell, chocolate malted inside).
The malt eggs are different colors and flavors, purple with orange malted being the strongest and most unpleasant because of the overpowering orange taste. The yellow outside, cookie dough malted inside is a little milder, but not much, and the pink with strawberry inside might do for artificial strawberry lovers.
If I got stuck with these as the only candy in the house—not likely—I'd try to scrape off or strategically bite around the white egg to enjoy the crunchy chocolate malt.
Worst malted milk balls ever.