Friday, May 09, 2008

Moving Backwards

RR1 PopcornThis post brought to you by Rural Route 1 'ip Balm and Popcorn, The Popcorn I'm Eating Right Now

So this is what a horse camp looks like. I see, it's a plug and hitch. Is the outlet for Electric Horses, or possibly Electric Sheep? Which picnic table is for the gastrically challenged? Do horses picnic?

Horse campWhere is everyone?

Weather Vane
(Flashback)
The same creature which horse rumped me in Sparta, man handled (horse handled) my friend's smooth coated fox terrier. After a long weekend on the Sparta farm, his owner brought him in for canine acupuncture.
One of the funniest images I can picture which I haven't actually seen, is Chico the terrier, super snout and all, getting cranial acupuncture ("I've only had cranial acupuncture." Place the quote and win a postcard. Really, I'm on a pc hunt. You should like that, James, "Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm hunting hippies." ).

This horse, picnicing somewhere near the campground, reminded me of those downtown squirrels. Bastards. It was all hooves and bad attitude. A neighbor and I had a theory that the squirrels which terrorized us outside of our Ingersoll apartment, had a stash of lost socks and laundry next to a pile of weed and government cheese. They stored it in the yellow garage next door which no one seemed to enter.
Or more significantly, leave.

C.C. Winkle cornMy Rural Route 1 caramel corn and cashews dipped in creamy fudge, originally meant for my parents, would have been squirrel jacked before I reached the stoop. The little freaks would have snatched the bag, then taunted me like I was sitting in the back of the Park St. bus (childhood trauma).
My mother has been more critical than usual since she's been sick, and I didn't want her slamming my C.C. Winkle. Somewhere between Montfort and Verona I'd become protective of the fudge corn, and decided to keep it for myself. They got the Rainbow, which she didn't like.
Sigh.
Let me put that first statement in perspective, saying my mother is more critical than usual is like saying Cub's fans have been less tolerable than usual. No? Okay, the tornado was breezier than usual. Darth Vader seemed in a worse mood of late.

Me and GabeSo I kept the C.C. Winkle and am still eating it a week after my birthday (two days after my Steven's birthday party). God I'm fat. Chomp, mmffph. Use the fork, Luke.
The popcorn itself is smooth coated, only with fudge, not fur. There's a sunny crunch of thin caramel just a breath after the lavish first bite of cashew and fudge. The fudge compliments, not over powers, the brittle layer of caramel, and the soft nuts (ha) only make the experience more decadent. I got two large bags of RR1 corn (and a post card) for something like four bucks, and the cashier seemed to apologize for the price.
Still sampling their wares during the bagging of the corn, the swiping of the plastic, and the heading for the door, I was like Beatrix Kiddo in the back of Buck's Pussy Wagon willing my big toe to leave the store.

WyalusingConsidering I spent the day tromping around the likes of this, I guess I deserved a little sugar.
Now, "Wiggle your big toe."
Photo of Gabe and me by Tammi

25 comments:

  1. ...see if you give your mom all your fudge corn, she'll feel better, and she won't be able to say anything (on account of the corn?)

    It sounds really good, but I want some ip balm.

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  2. "I've only had cranial acupuncture."

    Hmmmmmmmm.......Pinhead from Hellraiser?

    Ya got me there sweety!!!!!

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  3. Nice thought, Jodi, but I think one of Cakespy's recipes are more in order here. See what I mean when I say how nice it is that my family doesn't read this?

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  4. Great guess, gop dog. How's mum? The "you got me there sweety" is getting warmer.

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  5. Oh that carmel corn sounds gooooooooood....but I don't know about cranial acupunture. That's sounds painful!!

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  6. Happy Mudders Day! My mum's doin' great.How's your's?
    You have me cranial rectal inverted with the acupuncture quote? Google can't even help me get my head out of my gop arse?

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  7. Hey Olga, is your mom a full figured five clasp?
    I need some cranial acupuncture right about now.

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  8. If you don't watch tele, James, you won't know the quote.
    My mother screamed at the top of her lungs when I dropped off Mickey D's pancakes and a Deluxe breakfast along with a lovely plant, German bakery, card, and newspaper this morning.
    They were still sleeping.
    She called two-and-a-half hours later to say she didn't want the breakfast or bakery and that I scared her.
    Couldn't tell from the blood curdling scream. At 9:05 am.
    Sigh.

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  9. Dang! Caramel corn and cashews dipped in creamy fudge!?!?! *drool*

    Hey, from that photo it looks like you've got quite the sun tan already!

    What's with the word verifications these days? The one for this post is:
    "blwjbsfru". Meh...Maybe I just have my mind in the gutter and there isn't anything abnormal about that word verification.

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  10. That C.C. Winkel is good, very good, C.
    This Irish, Norwegian, Italian skin burns (then tans) in the rain.
    Safari makes me sign in every time now and I'm looking at a Word Verification that says sexeel, or pretty darn close.

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  11. I hain't got time to watch the tube! I'm guessing it must be from an episode of "Lost", ain't that like your favorite soap opera kind of thang.
    You scared your poor ole mom huh?
    Me and baby bro took mom out to "Something Fishy" last night for fried shrimp & oysters, crab cake, flounder,etc.
    Then I got her old arse up at 6:00am this morning. Takes her an hour to get ready, and we had to feed our doggies before we left.
    Had some real good friends come and pick us up at 7:00am on the dot and we went to IHOP for a killer breakfast. Mom just got 2 eggs sunny side up with grits and bacon. I got the breakfast sampler with the works, and a nice creme filled slice of french toast smothered in strawberries that mom helped me eat.
    She was glad we got up early and did it cause the place was gettin'pretty crowded before we left.
    We napped and goofed off the rest of the day....(I pretended to watch tv w/her)...skipped lunch for junk food...Baby bro came over and we had Dominoes Extravaganza Pizza for supper during a freak hail storm.
    Darn......gotta go let the dogs out in the flooded back yard!!!!!I better get their life jackets!
    I'll be back!!!!!

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  12. Oh yeah ....I got mom the mushy card and cash! She'll probably wind up spending all the cash at the gas pumps? I make sure she has enough to cover her trip.
    She comes up here and sits/lays on the day bed all day and watches TV? I can easily drag her out for food, but that's about the limit to the excitement.
    I'm honored that she comes to stay with me. She knows her little mutt LuLu is always welcome at my house, and that makes life easy for her.
    She'll leave LuLu with me for a few days while she visits her brother and my auntie.
    My comments are a little long winded....can ya tell I'm a little bored? Ya can't pretend to watch but so much of the Home & Garden channel!!!!!!!

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  13. No, no, not LOST, which yes, I love. I did leave a hint on Ms. Mamma's blog, but it wouldn't help you.
    Yes, Evelyn (pictured in the sidebar) screamed bloody friggin' murder this morning as I was hauling in European bakery and foliage. I believe I heard the old man slide a clip into one of his many bedside guns.
    Do you live close enough to the Atlantic to get decent seafood?
    Dang, 6 am, mom must be a good sport.
    My parents dragged me out to the local tribal gambling hall (where I think they pipe in cigarette smoke) for several hours. I had to beg them to leave.
    Creme filled french toast? Intense.
    How much younger is your brother? I can picture Em and Abby sinking into the lawn all pissed off that you made them go swimming in the lawn.
    You got your mom cash for Mother's Day? Ha, ha. What a guy.
    Have you talked about LuLu before? What kind of pooch is she?

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  14. LOL! Oh, my goodness! Jimmy, those are some MASSIVE comments you left! LOL! I don't think I've ever seen you write such lonnnnnnng comments...and in the same day all on the same day!?!?!?!

    Mmmmmm...IHOP! That's one thing I miss! Whenever I'm in the U.S. we go to IHOP for breakfast. We've got a franchise something like that in Ontario called The Golden Griddle...but it's just not the same as IHOP!

    Something Fishy, eh?! The food sounds delish, but you have to wonder about eating at a place called Something Fishy! LOL! ;) Anyway, the seafood sounds yummy and you are such a sweet son for giving your Ma a mushy card and money.

    Jeanna, I just realized something funny. Hubby and I live on Rural Route 1! A friend of mine and his wife in England were sending us an invitation to their wedding and forgot our address. They just wrote on the envelope: Christine and John, RR1, Manitoulin Island, Ontario, Canada and the invitation got to us! LOL! That's how small town this is! They forgot to write our last name AND they didn't have our address or postal code and we still got it! Cracks me up! When I lived in the city, that would never have happened!

    Oh dear! My comment is just as long as Jimmy's! LOL!

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  15. Crap. I just re-read my comment. Look at all those freakin' type-o's! It's killing me, but I'm too lazy to delete it, correct it and repost! *sigh* OMG...my mother was right. I am super anal.



    GAH...not in the way you guys are thinking though! Ewww.

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  16. Must be catching, look at all the stuff I wrote. But I love to see people do that.
    I had a bad experience with chocolate chip pancakes washed down with many glasses of chocolate milk in high school at IHOP. I suppose we shouldn't have gotten that pitcher of Old Style before we went back to school.
    Puke.
    Hey, maybe I'll have to send you some RR1 fudge corn before it warms up. Not convinced it's going to, but that's okay with me. Sunny and 60 is heaven.
    I didn't notice the typos, but hate it when I make them. Which is always.
    I got a letter with no address on it once, but cab drivers and delivery people have a hard time finding this place. But people are always leaving off the apt. number. Maybe I'm less city than full of fertilizer.

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  17. I have to be short and sweet tonight!
    Yes I live close enough to the coast to get killer seafood!
    "Something Fishy" is excellent and it's always packed there!
    Lulu is my mom's 11 year old little pugster!
    http://uncivilone.blogspot.com/search?q=lulu


    ha,ha
    word verification xxrxl

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  18. Glad you finally found a horse. Did you plug him in?

    The popcorn looks yummy!

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  19. Ah geez, how sad. Yeah, I think they take it harder than us. The song is sweet and funny. I guess you are short and sweet.
    I think you and your mom have got two of the maybe four drop kick breeds I'd consider hanging out with on a regular basis.
    I like your X rated word verification, suits you.

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  20. Hi Lisa,
    That horse was so loud I think it had some kind of super hero vocal powers. It was telling me to back off with that little lens. Would have been a good time for a 100-400 mm on a Canon 40D.
    Didn't think I'd find any as good as Kernel Popcorn, but I think I got a great flavor as well. Pick some up if you see it. Their popping corn is quite good too.

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  21. Hey Hon.
    Just checkin' in on ya! Hope all is well!

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  22. Just checkin' in on ya! Hope all is well :) Hey, if I mail your parcel to the addy you gave me, will you still get it?!?!? You're moving, right? Lemme know! Wouldn't want your Manitoulin goodies not getting to your doorstep! ;)

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  23. Haven't decided if I'm moving, but cleaning as if I am. If I moved, it wouldn't be for a few months.

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  24. Ohhhhhhhhhhh! Okay! That's good to know!!! :)

    What are you doing with those VHS tapes? Selling them locally? Selling them on eBay? I was surprised the other day when I was shopping and saw some of my all time favourite movies (on VHS) for sale at $3.99 a pop! And I paid like $14.99 or more brand new when VHS was 'in'! Gah! Thank goodness we never got BETA! Remember those?? We were too behind in the technology scene when I was a kid. I think we only got our first VCR and microwave when I was 13!!!! LOL! I was still playing my records (yes, RECORDS!!!) in high school! I think I only switched from cassettes to CDs when I was in college! Sad. I know. Hmmmm...I wonder where my parents' 8-track is!?! Would that even be worth anything? LOL!

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  25. I'm not even trying to sell them. But I'm taking the time to divide them into three or four piles for people. And those I can't part with. So little time, so much taping to do.
    Yeah, BETAs were the best.
    Hey records are coming back. I loved 8-tracks, but too bulky. If you were here I'd pack up several dozen and give 'em to ya.

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